I will start by saying: these posts about my childhood trauma I’m telling you guys; are a heavy topic. Sensitive people and minors are advice to not read this. The content contains rape, violence, mental abuse, physical abuse, and death. Sociopaths, psychopaths and a lot of narcissism.
I write it here to sort out my flashbacks and memories.
But also, to leave something for investigation, in case something bad happens to me. I have survived a lot and it would be a shame to get this far and not be able to tell my story, just in time.
This is in Sweden.
Ali couldn’t believe that some of these women had the audacity to follow him around and ask him to have sex with them. He was not impressed and didn’t want to fucking entertain any of them. They bored him to death. He felt lonely and was looking for someone he could have a real connection/relationship with. He used to fuck around and smack their asses. He saw them as big phonies.
Especially this one at our kindergarten. Our mom told her to slap him in the face when he was “acting up”. So whenever she felt like it, or when his Tourette Syndrome burst out she took the freedom to take away his freedom. She slapped him really hard on the face. When other pre-school teachers were around she used to threaten him and hid the fact that she hit him.
At kindergarten, when Ali felt he was about to get his burst out’s, he used to go away and fight his struggle on his own. He screamed and fought so hard, telling us to not come near him. He would spit and throw up. He would fight the air so hard as if something was trying to take hold of his head. He fought until he was sweaty, red and had tears in his eyes. And then breath heavily.
When she heard about who he really was, which Ali hid very well but our mother exposed. She wanted to get some. And she paid our mom well. She didn’t let him play in peace and she would wake him up from nap time. She acted very dangerously and wouldn’t let him play with the toys he regularly played with. Someone saw her slapping him and told the police. She was not even registered as an employee and she didn’t come back. This girl was just too horny for her own good. She was the one that would follow him home and he would lock her out.
She talked to our mom and told her that she could transform him. So at kindergarten, she had him in her grip and she wanted it her way. Not knowing or respecting that he knew these stuff without her having to abuse him. You know, they groom us kids to believe it’s our passion. She made him into a king in kindergarten for a minute to humiliate him the next minute. As long as it suited her she acted normally. Sometimes she just wanted to show her superiority and she’d tell him to put his hands up when he wasn’t listening to her and hit him on his hands. Ali had a lot of fears but didn’t show them. However, when she got him for herself I saw the fear in his eyes.
As long as it suited her she acted normally. Sometimes she just wanted to show her superiority and she’d tell him to put his hands up when he wasn’t listening to her and hit him on his hands. Ali had a lot of fears but didn’t show them. However, when she got him for herself for days and nights, I saw the fear in his eyes. She didn’t even come to work. She sold drugs.
Ali works hard so this shit won’t happen. But some people just go around looking for problems, like this girl. She couldn’t stand that he had mastered the shit on his own. My brother had big dreams and obviously wanted to leave this unsuitable life behind. While normal kids were busy laughing and playing. Ali was busy plotting. Trying to make his and my days better. Such daddy. This kid met failure after failure without any loss of enthusiasm. Or so it seemed. He had lots of love for me. And that saved me.
She wouldn’t let him go home when he hadn’t been nice that day and hadn’t “listened”. The thing with our mom was that she listened and believe everyone except her own children. So Ali had sleepovers with this woman and our mom let her fool her. She killed the bitch in him, gave him stitches in his head. But he finally came back, he had survived.
He told me everything he had seen in her house. Han va helt vettskrämd! This woman had stolen other boys and girls from the street and forced them to do stuff they didn’t want to do. She had a camera. Then Ali told me that she doesn’t like boys. She likes women. She had been filming herself with another woman in the shower. I had missed him so much. He was crying and he felt powerless. I was a lonely child since they took my twin sister away. Ali loved me and protected me very much even when he had his own struggles. I couldn’t relate to his story. Still, he was a dad to me.
It started depending on who brought us home. When my grandpa came very late he left Ali with her. She took Ali and his friends home to her. Later Ali went on his own will. She bribed him and told him he would get famous. Ali had a hole in his shoes. Of course, this was a deal to him. Especially when he saw how everyone else was struggling to get deals.
He even took me with him to her house. All he did was watch TV and getting pampered. Actually getting his balls licked. He had learned to be the man of the house. Eww, so old school. He had a girlfriend over there. He liked her but had to play the bad boy towards when they were filming. He tried to convince her to stay positive. But she was just too bored.
He was confused why she wouldn’t take his bullshit together with his romance. His romance game is strong, but ain’t nobody dumb enough to stay with a fuckboy. This teacher had taught him well. She had fucked his head up. Ali was naturally a lover but the way he dealt with girls did not announce any progress. This might have been his first heartbreak. Since he lost his mind and felt lonely.
This pre-school teacher is the one that killed his friends. That’s why Ali changed. Still, she had the audacity to blame Ali for that. She told the kid’s mom it was Ali that had killed her son.
Now that kid’s mother told our mom to take Ali’s life, for her own son’s life. Our mom got really scared when Ali stole a gun and stopped going to kindergarten. He was on the run and now he called the shots.
Sexually transmitted diseases
Ali got sexually transmitted diseases from her and it burned when he peed. Of course, he told me. He told me everything. He even showed me.
The same woman that worked at kindergarten performed female genital mutilation on me later on. I was around 5 years (7 years), had changed kindergarten and moved from Stockholm to Uppsala. Bitch, Imma catch you.
Our mom accused Ali of shooting his friend. Yes, we are still talking about a 6-year young boy. He had 4 guns in his room that the grown-ups had hidden there. It’s not that hard to find them in a minimalistic household. Especially not when the ones “hiding” the guns were bragging about their guns.
My brother felt endangered. Yes, his friend had been shot but it was not him who did it. He took the gun after he found his friend dead.
My dad had moved out and we were struggling to get by. We were slowly falling apart. Ali felt and took a responsibility he did not have to. He took me out with him to the mall to sell ourselves. By now I had learned enough. We went out early in the morning. Even when it rained. In fact, we loved the rain and used to kiss under an umbrella. He was a shy boy.
Ali became violent after he saw his friends getting killed. None of them had fathers to protect them. They had to depend on themselves. Everyone was running around looking for Ali, saying he had a gun and needed to be caught. Such llama drama! They wanted him dead, he told me.
Rumors had it by my mom, that he would just shot anyone. Rumors had it that those videos were selling good, too. So people were jealous and shit.
Calling the shots
Ali got mad when nothing happened with this video that was supposed to sell. Yeah, he is not a clever business man. He got mad at this teacher and the contract he had apparently signed. Yea, he is not good at reading people either.
He trusted her and she broke his trust. Now the rumors were turning into reality. Tired of running from people. He now ran after them.
Now, he was getting down to business. He was fast and he had one goal. To get rid of those contract criminals.
Payback for all the triggers she had caused him I guess.
He was finally home. He had no victim mentality but he found no loyalty in anyone around him. Not even me, basically me and my twin confused him. He bullied Fatima because he heard I was in danger.
He hated his own reflection and compared himself to the grown-ups bodies. It didn’t help that they called him gay (as if it is something lesser) and turned him into a girl. Anywho. He used to experiment on his own, like dressing in dress and put make-up on. He didn’t mind. The grown-ups did it too and no one said anything. If they told him not to do any of that. He did it even more.
Tourette syndrome showed when he was confronted with a mirror. He would jump away and scream. He hated seeing his reflection. I guess this teacher had given him a self-image complex.
Thank you for reading through!
(Why is gay synonymous to something less valued to these “people”? They clearly are gay and in self-denial just fucks up your life. This rape culture wouldn’t have existed if they could have accepted themselves for who they really are. No restrictions. They like butts. My dad really likes butts. When he broke up with Zazia he brought only homosexuals to the house. because they were “sinning”. He would sin with them one last time and then kill and dissect them. You know what I say to that! Bull!!! That’s just a fucking terrible excuse to why you can’t allow your true sexual nature take hold. People with a clear sexual orientation are not sinning. Killing is. Raping is. Hate crime is.
When you get high dad, your true face shows. Marijuana is supposed to be a medicine and nothing more. Your repressed excuses show. Wipe your mouth from all the bullshit you have in you please. It’s too obvious that you are gay and can’t control yourself. )
Where in the Quran does it say that you can kidnap homosexuals and females and then tie their butts to a rope from the ceiling? Just so your rape friends can be impressed. What role model are you trying to be?
Thank God, Ali is not ashamed of any of your bullshit. He got a bit affected and you did disturb his body image. But thank God Ali didn’t see any of that.)